“Two and a Half Men” Creator is Confused

Chuck Lorre, known for running a “Vanity Card” at the end of each of his television sitcoms, posted an interesting confession at the end of this Monday’s episode of “Mom” on CBS:

“I’m confused as to why a poorly designed website means affordable health care is a bad idea.”

Frankly, Chuck, I’m confused as to why your shows appear to use a laugh track if they are so well written – even if it is an actual live audience. But hey, this isn’t about MY vanity: My website might attract about 100 people a month – a number that’s probably negative if I don’t include hackers, spammers, web bots and the occasional misdirect…but, I digress.

As I’ve stopped watching “Two and a Half Men” since Charlie Sheen left quit was fired I’ve managed to free up an extra 22 minutes this week, so let me try to clear up your confusion by posing a rhetorical*:

If the Democrat Party Obama Administration United States Government isn’t even smart enough to:

contract a software company that was competent enough to build the initial website (curious ties to Michelle Obama notwithstanding),
select a software company that volunteered to fix and run the Healthcare.gov for free,
schedule enough time to properly debug the site,
means test the site for traffic volume (it failed at 1100 simultaneous users when tested a day before the release date),
properly install even rudimentary protection against viruses and identity theft (site was hacked in 4 minutes),
create and deploy the “back end” billing software required to reconcile payments between insurance companies and the government (it’s why payments can take as long as two weeks to process)

and, after knowing all of that months before their legislated deadline for implementation,

delay the website’s roll-out until the site was robust enough to allows clients even a marginally chance of successfully using it to sign up for health insurance (ObamaCare is not health care!) they are compelled to have by law,

…then how can that same Government even begin to correctly and efficiently design, run, secure, track, manage, deliver, and improve a health care system representing 17% of the USA’s economy?

It’s just that simple, and I hope this helps ease your confusion.

There’s no need to thank me, Chuck; however, if you’d like to perhaps you could write an 26-part episode where ObamaCare is used to reanimate Charlie Harper remains after his untimely and gruesome death? I’m guessing it would be comedy gold!

(oh…, and speaking of that same Vanity Card, yes, Chuck, you should stop writing your “freekin’ vanity cards”)

*although, if you’d like to provide an answer I’d be both awed and thankful