Can’t Cope with Trump’s Win? Try This!

Introducing COPIUM – Convenient Relief from Post-Election Grief!

Disclaimers:
• This product doesn’t exist, don’t even bother asking your doctor or pharmacist about it.
• Any statements on the label have not been evaluated by the FDA.
• This is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

Take a close look at the label and enjoy how clever and humorous it is. And don’t call the phone number unless you really want to actually talk to the White House – that’s their Main Number. You can thank me later

Added Bonus! If you have an empty prescription bottle handy why not print out the label, attach it to the bottle, fill the bottle with candy (like SweeTarts® or Smarties®), and give it a grieving Liberal? Consoling a Loser is what a gracious Winner would do.

It’s been a little over a week since Trump swept the 2024 Elections, and some who voted for his campaign opponents might still be feeling a bit unwell, experiencing symptoms such as grief, anxiety, uncertainty, depression, screaming at the sky, and wailing and gnashing of teeth.

And, by “some people”, I’m referring to about 72,953,282 voters who voted for Kamala Harris, who lost to President Donald J. Trump by about 3,000,000 votes.

After basking in the glow and JOY! of Trump’s historic political comeback – especially after his debatable 2016 loss – I paused to remember elections are just a competitive game, everybody wants to win, there can only be one winner, the winner may not be your team, there’s always another game, and it pays to be a good sport for the sake of the game. You know, all those things I learned as a kid from responsible grownups. Things some people didn’t learn, may have forgotten, or chose to ignore in their desire to win.

So, if you voted for Joe Biden – America’s gravity-challenged, stumbling, bumbling, brain-addled, physically deteriorating, mispronouncing, grifting gaffe machine – during the primaries, only to see your vote tossed aside when Kamala Harris was coronated the Democrat Nominee, and/or voted for Kamala Harris – America’s vacuous, loquacious, cackling, press-avoiding, policy-free, non-black, middle-class Socialist concubine who’s an expert at Word Salads and who’s campaign suffered from “industrial strength incompetence” and you’re having problems coping with Trump’s overwhelming victory, then perhaps COPIUM might be right for you!