I’m a simple man with only a few, simple needs: Find the perfect mate, win a big Powerball Jackpot, have the body of Adonis, never pay taxes, and not be selfish, greedy, vain, or miserly.

But, after seeing this I knew I needed it…and, Santa, the sooner you give me this for Christmas the better!

Failing that, Santa, perhaps some winning Powerball tickets? Or, maybe a lifetime tax abatement? I’ll leave extra cookies, milk, and carrots.

Thanks for Reading! (and, Merry Christmas!)