It’s that time of year again when the marketing guys at Fenway Park (MY most-beloved ball park, regardless of what some baseball fans might think) announce their “Jingle your way to Fenway” contest, where you can win one of a number of nice prizes, including tickets to see the Sox play against the N(ext) Y(ear) Yankees during 2012. According to the rules: “To enter the contest, you must submit written lyrics to a creative holiday jingle about the Red Sox. It should be a catchy combination of holiday spirit and passion for the Red Sox.”
Now, I’m neither musically nor lyrically inclined – I vaguely remember playing the flute recorder in Junior High music class, and might recall how to play the “Budweiser” song with one finger on the piano if given enough intimidation motivation drinks.
Still, entering sounds easy enough. After all, the 2011 Red Sox gave The Nation plenty of material to work with: The worst season start in their history; spectacular summertime performances by David Ortiz, Jacoby Ellsbury, Adrian Gonzales, and the man who’s level of play demands the invention of new adjectives to properly describe it, Dustin Pedroia; the usual string of unfortunate injuries compounded by some abysmal performances; and a late-season collapse second only to the Yankee’s spectacular post-season collapse of 2004. Yes, the 2011 Season was certainly memorable… in a deer-in-the-headlights, not-enough-lifeboats, weapon-of-mass-destruction kind of way. (Here’s one summary for Sox masochists who enjoy weeping and gnashing of teeth during the offseason.)
That said, here’s my 5-minute attempt at 5-minutes of musical fame – if I’m lucky, perhaps will last a little longer. (And, don’t worry Red Sox owners: I’ve already put a deposit down on my 2012 tickets… I’ve been a fan for so long that I’m numb to my masochistic pain.)
Let ‘em Go!
(sung to the tune of “Let it Snow!”)
Oh the pitching we had was frightful,
And the losses weren’t delightful.
As the season’s already blown,
Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go!
It doesn’t show signs of easing,
‘cuz our lineup isn’t pleasing,
With Division-leading chances low
Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go!
When we finally leave Fenway Park,
How I hate hearing Yankee fans’ jeers,
But if we pool our monies right,
We’ll drown all our sorrows in beers!
Oh the Sox are prob’ly lying,
When they say “No need for crying!”,
But what do those Owners know?
Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go! Let ‘em go!
